I am not dead.
This is an update to my blogg.
If I ever stop for a year then I am 100% dead.

Any way last night I had a dream of a girl forn ow I will call her C.
I was siting with my back against a concrete wall. I was siting next to C and to friends C sat next to my right foot ant the others to my left. She wore short jeans and a gray/black t-shirt. I told C I was sad because of how lonely I was on the planet and she started looking sad. My butt hurt from sitting but I stayed with her and her friends because in real life I almost never talk to her,because I am so shy.

Out of noware my shoes were gone I was wearing gray socks and then I look to her and she was wearing thin black socks. Ignoring the awkward situation I was in I started talking to her friends. Then she moved about 3 of her toes on the center of my foot. I started to question if she was actually flirting with me or if she forgot my foot was there. To check I moved my toes just slightly to she what she would do.

Then she sat next to my right side and started petting my chest. (not sure why but I was buff lol) Anyway I could not move after that my heart was pounding so heard I could even hear it! she grabbed my arm and held it against her body and hugged it as if it was a teddy bear. Realizing SHE WAS FLIRTING I grabbed her hand tightly. She placed her head on my shoulder and I placed her head on hers my body started to feel warm and I FELT REALLY REALLY HAPPY then she looked at her friends hwo were to my left and started talking to them. Then I saw her face clear as day.

I felt so happy and warm and then I started to pant because my heart was going to explode. I woke up laying right side flat on my bed with a BIG smile on my face. I kind of wish I could sleep forever sometimes because this world sucks. The real life C would never flirt with me sometime I think she only talks to me out of pitty.

I lost my job as a pizza guy so that sucks. Mia talked to me a couple of days ago and asked me why I am keeping her on hold for all these months. But what I did not tell her is that I still love her and that after all this time I think of her too. I just hope god has a new plan for me soon because if things stay the way they are I am really screwed.