I'm starting to get desperate again. I want to leave my parents house already and start my own life with a wife I don't even have. I wonder sometimes why I lead such a sad life all I do everyday is hate myself for who I am and when I try to cheer myself up and do something about my life. I lose motivation and ponder the point of even going on with this life. I know my time is short here but its taking to long to find love all the girls I meet are selfish and self centered.

I wonder if I did something to deserve this. If a man is left alone to his thoughts I can guarantee he will go insane, I just hope their is still time before I become hateful towards everyone I meet.