Today I went on a small mental health day with my friends it was great to be out of my room for the day even though the environment was not very pleasing due to the rain the day turned out decent and i came home a bit emotionally disturbed because I was reminded of how all of this enjoyment will end in about a month as my clock ticks away i can only imagine the hell I will facing in boot camp I may not be ready but I am not going to give up on myself i refuse to be the same as everyone around me I don't want a

plain life i want to achieve immortality in the minds of humans across the world.

During my mental heath day with the guys I stumbled upon a book that had a familiar character that I haven't seen since the ninth grade I read the book next to Rumel and reminisced on that horrible year.

I will soon be heading off to pt again I am counting the days in my head and I only wish the days could stop for me but I am sure men across the world already screamed to the heavens to stop time when the world around them was being destroyed I hate the idea that my father is getting old I hope I am the last person he sees before he has his last breath on this earth

again i thought of mia

i wish these memorys would go away

the emotion is killing me inside and i cant get it out

i wish this were all a bad dream and i could wake up 9 years old again

i would have another chance to relive the years I dreamed about her face

in those young years the world was magic to me

now its a nightmare....